Here’s the start of a new series of posts…”the eavesdroppings.” Everyone seems to ask the same questions about what to do here in Dallas, and we all answer them differently, depending on our motives.

While chatting with my friend Jon today, it got me thinking about making this series of posts via interviews with various people in and around Dallas looking for things to do. I mean who doesn’t like peeking into other people’s conversations in that reality entertainment, voyer whore sort of way. So I decided to ask him a few questions about his plight in being a single Dallas-ite, and how he fills his time. I barely get to hang out with him, but by the end of the conversation we had scheduled a time to hang out, with the open invitation to have anyone that reads this come by and say hello.

SO 9 pm, this Monday at the Grapevine (3902 Maple Ave – corner of Maple and Oak Lawn) we’ll be doing something rather than wondering why we’re doing nothing. Come by. Say hello…you just might be the next to get interviewed for an upcoming Eavesdropping.

Also feel free to contact either Jon or myself on AIM. Our buddy names can be found in our conversation…we ain’t shy.

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dotcomtaken

: do you feel that every time you go out you are on "the lookout" for someone to date?

s0apstarj0e

: The "lookout" is always in the back of my mind. First and foremost I go out to be around my friends that live in Dallas. Bars are filled with hunters and game, so you know, I think all of us keep our eyes open for someone to shoot and mount on our wall.

s0apstarj0e

: No, not at all. It gives me something to bitch and moan about.

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dotcomtaken

: What is it you usually do on a saturday night down there in dallas?

s0apstarj0e

: I don’t usually go out on Sat nights. Every place is too crowded- half the night is spent trying to find a place to park. And then once you are drunk and get kicked out at two the road hogs are on the prowl trying to bust you. Everything seems more dramatic on Saturdays.

dotcomtaken

: So you do go out then?

s0apstarj0e

: fuck ya i do

s0apstarj0e

: I’m a broke college student, so I typically go out on Mondays, its less crowded and the drinks are cheaper

s0apstarj0e

: or Sundays

dotcomtaken

: Do you typically go out by yourself, or do you usually go with friends?

s0apstarj0e

: It depends. I usually meet up with friends but I find the most entertaining nights are nights where my friends hop over to my place first and we shoot the shit for a while and then go out

dotcomtaken

: Have you ever "gone out" on your own?

s0apstarj0e

: Almost. I went out once to meet my friends who happened to take their sweet ass time meeting me. So I was alone for almost an hour and fourty-five minutes. It sucked, but I got approached by many interesting individuals. I felt like I had a big bulls eye on my chest.

dotcomtaken

: do you feel that every time you go out you are on "the lookout" for someone to date?

s0apstarj0e

: The "lookout" is always in the back of my mind. First and foremost I go out to be around my friends that live in Dallas. Bars are filled with hunters and game, so you know, I think all of us keep our eyes open for someone to shoot and mount on our wall.

s0apstarj0e

: No, not at all. It gives me something to bitch and moan about.

dotcomtaken

: so what would you bitch and moan about if you were dating someone?

s0apstarj0e

: I hope I wouldn’t. If I were dating someone who I really saw a possibility with I think I would be too focused on the time spent with them than bitching about being single. If I were dating someone I wouldn’t consider myself "single" in the single-minded sense.

dotcomtaken

: i think that a lot of people feel that being single sucks so much that it keeps them from enjoying the time they don’t have to worry about the compromises that come from having another person around.

dotcomtaken

: that was a loaded statement

s0apstarj0e

: haha, i think its true

s0apstarj0e

: It’s like people with curly hair wishes it were straight and vice-versa

s0apstarj0e

: but being single and being coupled both come with their advantages and disadvantages

s0apstarj0e

: my time is my time, but when I’m sick there is no one making me soup

dotcomtaken

: right…but doesn’t it feel like you can’t just enjoy the moment, if you are hating moments where you’d rather have it another way (i.e. being in a relationship)

s0apstarj0e

: no, not at all

s0apstarj0e

: I don’t think anyone has that strong of a one-track mind

dotcomtaken

: thus making going out and meeting new people feeling more like a chore, and not fun anymore

dotcomtaken

: at least sometimes

s0apstarj0e

: I think the people you are describing need to talk to a professional about it

s0apstarj0e

: because they run the risk of being in a relationship just so that they aren’t alone, and those never turn out well

dotcomtaken

: i see…any recommendations?

dotcomtaken

: just kidding

dotcomtaken

: where have you met people that you’ve dated in the past?

s0apstarj0e

: Ha ha. My first boyfriend I met at work, actually. I was a waiter and he would come in once a week. The second boyfriend I had I met at a bar called the Grapevine, and we are still friendly to each other. And my last boyfriend I met through mutual friends.

s0apstarj0e

: but I have (of course) dated some people in between those three

s0apstarj0e

: and the one place I have had the most luck is the Grapevine bar

dotcomtaken

: which was your preferred method of introduction? work, bar, or friends

s0apstarj0e

: Friends…although that one can be really tricky. It sucks being in a relationship with someone who is also friends with your friend. I have been that in-between friend and I can tell you from personal experience that it is tough being in the middle…you hear all the good and bad things from both friends and sometimes you just want to move cities until the relationship ends…and once it ends then the real "fun" begins. But…friends introducing you to other people is great because they know you and they know the other person. For instance, if my best friend says "I want you to meet so-and-so I think you would really hit it off." I am excited because my friend knows my type and knows my hang-ups so it saves some time, and a good friend wouldn’t try to hook you up with a train wreck.

dotcomtaken

: So how often do you meet and make new friends that can potentially open up your network of new friends of friends of friends?

s0apstarj0e

: all the time. That’s the good thing about going out at least once a week with a set group of people. At least once a month a new person is introduced.

dotcomtaken

: How about making friends on the web?

s0apstarj0e

: These new friends of friends might not turn into close friends, but at least you have some new familiar faces to see later on.

s0apstarj0e

: I have made few friends from the web. I haven’t had too much luck there, but I have made some great friends so it was worth it.

s0apstarj0e

: few people are true representations of themselves over the web. On the web everyone drives a huge fuckin truck and have brass balls.

s0apstarj0e

: metaphorically

dotcomtaken

: Then if you ever meet…

s0apstarj0e

: they tend to be pretty nice

s0apstarj0e

: haha

dotcomtaken

: haha

dotcomtaken

: just so I know, can i use your AIM buddy name when i post this?

s0apstarj0e

: sure

dotcomtaken

: word…i’m thinking of making this an ongoing thing

dotcomtaken

: random Q&A with friends

s0apstarj0e

: its fun, i feel special

dotcomtaken

: Ok so, if someone reads this and wants to try and be your friend, how should they approach you…say at the Grapevine on any given sunday or monday?

s0apstarj0e

: sure, i will probably be there, or they can just say "hi" to me on myspace or over AIM

dotcomtaken

: haha…we should both meet up at the Grapevine on one of those days to see if anyone shows up and says hello

s0apstarj0e

: it would be more fun if you drank too

dotcomtaken

: then we’ll write about it

s0apstarj0e

: and what if no one comes?

dotcomtaken

: we’ll write about that too

s0apstarj0e

: haha DO IT

s0apstarj0e

: tell those mf’ers to say hi to us this monday night

dotcomtaken

: ok what time?

s0apstarj0e

: lets say 9

s0apstarj0e

: still early..but not too early

dotcomtaken

: ok sounds fun…i’ll post this…tonight

dotcomtaken

: with or without edits…haha

s0apstarj0e

: oooh send me a link when you do

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