Oh man…so I got tired of sitting on my couch, watching The Simpsons yesterday, so I figured I’d take a trip over to Northpark, aka the most unmall-scented mall ever. It’s the closest mall to wear I live.

I discovered upon arrival that Northpark has an entire wing that I was previously completely unaware of. What’s more, this wing has an Anthropologie. AND a colony of well-dressed mall-walkers. (I tried to take a picture, but my stealth was no match for their speed.)

I’m assuming that this wing is going to be used for the Nordstrom, which is opening soon…according to the HUGE sign at the end. Yes!! This is awesome for me ’cause pretty much on a daily basis, I think to myself…”Yanno…Dallas doesn’t have NEARLY enough overpriced department stores in our malls…can’t we just open JUST ONE MORE Neiman Marcus?” Behold! Nordstrom! Neiman Marcus’ bastard cousin.

I felt really trendy, like, the whole time. It was awesome. I found that it’s really hip to have a hole in your jeans. (Matador pants are also in style, but I was on an escalator when I went past them…so no picture.) Completely exciting, you guys! Mainly ’cause my jeans had a big hole in them, too! Was I cheating the style gods by owning a $20 pair of jeans that I got several years ago and have actually worn a hole in? After all…why spend $19.50 at Old Navy when I can spent $128 at Express! AND not have to do all the work of actually breaking in my jeans!!

I walked by this sign and it made me a little uncomfortable.

Whatever happened to Bath and Body Works? There’s so much useless stuff in there now. And there’s this neverending stream of perky employees seeing how I’m doing and giving me free things. And they don’t have my lotion anymore. Jerks.

Dudes…I have this advice for you: It doesn’t matter how secure you are in your masculinity or how many of your Dude-Bras you’re hanging out with or how many girls you can get with in one drunken night…pink is NOT a man color. EVER.

There are a lot of shirts telling me how awesome it is to be blonde. I wouldn’t know.

All-in-all…the mall was fun. As fun as the mall can be, anyway. I left Northpark feeling a little wiser and a little more fulfilled. Then drove around listening to “Under Pressure” by David Bowie and Queen and felt AWESOME.

On an unrelated note, Tuesday nights at Down Bar = Fun. My friend Vincent plays sax in some jazz ensamble (sp?)…so he’s there every Tuesday and had been bugging me to go for some time. It was nice to see Vincent and the atmosphere was pretty cool and it was really easy to buddy up with the people there…despite the creepy guy who hit on me but wouldn’t pay for my drink. At one point, I literally had to yank my hand away from his…

But I think I have a new Tuesday night ritual.